Process of Forgiving

A Post By Nicey

"Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamour and evil speakings be put away from you with all malice. And be ye kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another even as God for Christ's sake has forgiven you" - Ephesians 4:31-32


I regret that this post could not have been written earlier. The reason I could not have written it long ago is because my heart did not feel it. As many of you that watch our youtube page know, my mother and I have a family that refuses to acknowledge what they have done to us. The above scripture is a law we are all to live by but it proves to be difficult when we've been done wrongly by certain people. It is very difficult to move forward when there is no closure. I am a product of this statement. Once my grandmother died in 2003, I was in deep sadness. Her and I were very close and it hurt me badly that she died when she did. However, there was a relief that I could cut ties from the extended family because of it. So, almost 10 years later, I have reached a dilemma: Several members of the extended family have either died or faced hardships and I have no emotion toward it. I have not felt bad about it because until my mother and I had a conversation about it last night, I did not realize how my lack of emotion and reaction affected her. It is very easy for me to dismiss drama and tune it out. In effect, I do not care if I ever see the person/people again and feel no pain when they go through pain. Although if they needed my help, I would quickly extend a hand, I do not feel emotionally effected by thier hardship. This is not a good thing. Christ teaches us that yes, there are very wicked peoiple and these people do not love Him, themselves or others. Yet, Christ teaches us we are to pray for them and love them just as if they did love us. Of course, this is one of the most difficult things to do. I must be mindful to care enough to pray for them and truly hope that they repent to Christ and let Him in to change their hearts.

I encourage you all to revisit the pain that others have bestowed upon you. If you keep it buried, you will never be healed. Although you may feel there is nothing in those areas that need healing, we are humans, created in God's image and we cannot dismiss the natural reactions to our spiritual setbacks. We must forgive, we must move forward, in order to move closer to Christ. Yes, you may not get closure from those that have done you wrong. However, Christ will give you peace, which is the ultimate closure. Let Him in!